For we must all learn to howl.

I was right.  Apparently this day COULD  get much worse. I don't want to talk about it, I'm so angry I'm shaking. 

It's been a hell of a morning - as far as bad mornings go, this one's in the running for first, second and third prize. I've got an interview later, and have to be in the orchard area by 9:30. I'd planned to get up at 6 to iron my clothes (formal wear ugh) and still have more than enough time to have a leisurely coffee and maybe breakfast.  Sounds foolproof, doesn't it? That's what I thought too. Now imagine waking up to see 6:43 on the clock instead of the expected 6:00. Speed ironing's never really been my forte, but I managed somehow. Points please! Grabbed a quick cuppa and got ready to hit the road... Effectively knocking my still-awaiting-growth miniature coffee plant off from my speaker and all over my desk. This is what happens when the logical side of you says you really shouldn't get a plant because no matter how small it is you don't have room in your room (hur hur) for a PLANT with SOIL and you're a klutz as it is so w...

This is hell. 3 hours of sleep - Coffee + Nothing to do + 6 hours to go = KILL ME NOW. I cannot see myself doing this for the next 5 months, I really can't. They might need the help, but this is so boring I want to cry. I literally have nothing to do for now, and blogging both here and Tumblr is making me feel very guilty. I mean, I want to get paid to blog (who doesn't?) but obviously I'll feel bad since I'm supposed to be doing something else. Does it count if they have nothing for you to do?

It's an update post, so my thoughts will be jumping around quite a bit. You've been warned! About my recent posts... I should be feeling more than slightly ashamed of them, shouldn't I? All that nonsense about love and feeling lonely... How sappy. How gross, actually... I should just keep quiet about these things from now on, actually... It's genuinely weird to read. Anyway! It's the holidays now, and we've got something like a 5-month break before the universities start their intake for the new  semester  trimester. Semester, trimester... It's like a new language that I need to get used to, with the dates all over the place as compared to poly schedules, and quite frankly it's tripping me up - I take back any complaints I might have had at the beginning of poly education about the "confusing" timetables and dates cos that shit's got nothing on universities. So... With a 5-month break comes the immediate need to GET A JOB. I've be...

Love... Love, love, love. It makes fools of all of us.  I feel like I've been the biggest fool in this game all my life. It feels like everyone's laughing at me behind my back, that pathetic girl who still blindly believes in that childish notion of soulmates. It's like I keep hoping and telling myself that as long as I remain hopeful, it'll be fine. I'll meet the right person someday. Pathetic, isn't it? But what's worse is how I want so badly to be done with this, yet I can't bear to let go of the hope that I might find someone if I hold out just a little longer. It's pathetic how I'm in love with Love. 

Still waiting. I'm a fool, aren't I? But I can't bear to stop hoping, not when he keeps dancing in and out of my dreams. His face is still shadowed, though.