For we must all learn to howl.

MY LAPTOP IS SICK. I swear, it has a virus, most likely passed on from some infected thumbdrive or something. Add to that the fact that my anti-virus system had expired approximately 11 months ago.... And we have a winner! Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding! So I've asked my mom to ask her colleague to help my poor lappie recover. Unfortunately, while the virus will be going beddy-bye-bye, I'll also be saying buh-bye to some of my other 'babies' in my lappie. Goodbye, iTunes. I will miss you. What I update and restore will never replace you. *snif* Goodbye, Windows Vista. Mom says she'll be loading Windows XP instead. *snif* Goodbye, Adobe Photoshop and Adobe Illustrator. After so damn long trying to load you in..... *cries*

So just to be random, here's a picture of how I looked with stage makeup, minus the bronzer. Hey, I took that stuff off the moment I got offstage and looked in the mirror! Anyway, this is what I looked like when I went for GDF tutorial yesterday. It may look alright, but it's really heavy makeup, and the camera couldn't capture that. I can only imagine what my classmates must have tweeted about me, since I make it a point not to follow them on Twitter. :)

Wow, it's already National Day, isn't it? I can't believe it's been so fast since I left NAS.... Huh, 46 years of our being independent. I'm so proud to be Singaporean! XD Although it sounds unbelievably cheesy when I say it out loud..... TP had its National Day Celebrations yesterday, and Theatro (TP's drama club, it's not really surprising that I've entered Drama again ) performed as part of the concert-skit thing that was put up XD Can you believe we were almost cut from performing at all, though? So unfair! >:( It's always the Drama Club that has to suffer most for our art... Rantings aside, I think we did really great! I was acting as a Malay girl in the 1850s, and borrowed Ain's baju as a costume. It fit well, seeing as we're pretty much equal in height. And we had to put stage makeup. Yep, even the guys! Haha!! {evil laughter} For those who aren't too sure, stage makeup is pretty much heavy makeup times ten. Something like...

I'm sick. Well, not really sick, more of the I-feel-that-I'm-gonna-fall-sick-soon kind of thing. I've lost my voice (going back to my husky roots, I don't understand why so many people say it sounds sexy. LOL.), and it sounds like I'm coming down with a cold, what with all the other symptoms that I would really prefer not to list here. Truth be told, I can feel that it's fatigue-induced. Without a doubt. I've been sleeping pretty late these few weeks (slightly past midnight, which is okay for teenagers but not okay for parents) and getting up pretty early, like 6.15am or so. Even on a Saturday I get up at 8 or 9, and that's the latest I can sleep. Sighs. Darn this infernal body clock. But then again, I've tried sleeping early and getting up late, and you know what? I feel just as bad. Maybe even worse. I feel worse everyday, and I'm really getting worried for my health. Sigh. Anyone care to sponsor coffee for me? {feel like I need an expresso.....

BOOYAW. It's raining, I'm cold and bored and tired. LOL.

I am..... - tomboyish - loud - naive - irritating - not pretty - annoying - less than perfect in so many ways But I am..... - not afraid to get dirty and have fun - not afraid to speak my mind and voice out - willing to believe the best in anyone - inquinsitive, and unafraid to ask - not fugly - dependable - loyal to a fault (I will die for people if I have to) - trustworthy - the best friend you will ever have, if you give me the chance to be - less than perfect in so many ways...... - but almost-perfect in so many more. Yes, I'm putting this up in case I ever get depressed again and need the emotional help. Haters F**K OFF.

I have never been perfect. I've always been fully aware of this statement, and yet have always felt comfortable enough to be me. But now I feel as though my inner strength and self-worth are being tested to the core. It's like for every time I tell myself that I am beautiful in my own right and deserve to be have the chance, my chance , to shine, there are at least 10 others who shoot me down and stomp all over me. If I were to describe myself as a doll right now, I'd be the dirty ragdoll that you would find thrown into the drain, waiting for the right person to see through all the layers of grime and filth and see, really see , the beauty inside that could be revealed if given the chance. I wore a skirt to school today. Ever since April, which was when school started, I'd been wearing jeans and a graphic tee, along with my beat-up sneakers, so the need to show my slightly girlier side was pretty much eating away at me. Yes, I wore a skirt with a tee to school today, an...