Ar-

I haven't seen you in a long time.
Let's be real - I haven't ever seen you. I don't even know what you look like. But the thing is, I used to dream about you, and often too. I wonder where you are now?

I used to hate the idea of soulmates - I never believed in the idea that someone out there was supposed to be my missing puzzle piece because I hated the thought of having to stay somewhat incomplete until I met whoever it was who was supposed to "complete" me.

It felt weak, somehow, knowing that whoever it was you were to be truly happy with wasn't going to be decided by you. It felt like some notion thought up by a silly lovesick schoolgirl to make herself feel better, thinking that there was someone out there who was in looooooove with her.

Of course, all that changed when I saw you for the first time. Or perhaps felt would be a better word - all I remember, all I'll always remember are your hands holding mine, holding me safe and warm and strong against you.

It's funny how my dreams have never shown me your face, never given me the chance to hear you speak, never given me the chance to know you. So why did it feel that we already knew each other?

The answer was a surprisingly simple one, and right in front of me too. Unfortunately, it was one I also wished to deny - there was no way that soulmates could exist.

The more I tried to deny you the more you insisted on returning to haunt me in my dreams. I find myself wondering about that these days. Do you really exist, or were you just someone I dreamed up because of the overwhelming loneliness?

I still don't have an answer. But the dreams have long stopped, and the loneliness remains.

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