Dictatorship

Good lord, how long has it been since I last blogged? So many things have happened... Or should I say so much schoolwork has happened.

The Photography essay has been submitted: I got a B grade. I don't know what to feel about my grade, right now it's just a grade to me. It doesn't mean anything more. I'm kind of disappointed in myself for not being able to get an A, but even I can tell you that my photos were not good enough. They're not shabby, but they definitely not fantastic either.

The Journalism assignments have been submitted, both the Individual Writing Assignment (IWA) and In-Class Assignment (ICA), and I'm pleased to be able to say that I scored an A for those. Whew!

Plus, we just submitted our ICA3 today at 5pm. To all girls out there: Running from Level 1 of a building to Level 4, then up to Level 6, and then down to Level 2 sucks. Running the whole course in formal wear and heels is hell. And did I mention I was in heels? Yeah, I was in heels. It's a wonder I didn't break my neck, knowing how klutzy I am.

For MMP, we've only just handed in our online report. Again, whew! And for Percomm, the report's in, so we need to prepare for our presentation on February 17th (same day as our MMP final-semester test), plus there's a trial presentation next Friday that I need to prepare for, and another one on any speaker I want the Friday after. And I need to submit photos again next Tuesday. SIGH.

To add on to the sighs, I think I messed up my Public Speaking speech. I dunno, I usually feel that Public Speaking (which is my CDS) is the one subject besides Journalism that I should be able to score in, so I always aim for an A in these subjects.

......................................................................................................

It sucks to know that my life consists only of school and work now. DAMMIT WHAT HAVE I BECOME. Since when was my life determined by my education????? When did education become a dictatorship for my life?

Okay, let me try to find something to talk about that doesn't involve school........

1. Oh, I'm going to Malaysia for the weekend. My parents thought it'd be brill to go to Malacca 2 weeks before I become a Year2 student, which I'm kinda grateful for (they've been nagging at me since April 2011 to relax a bit more, which is impossible, I tell you. UPTIGHT = NATALIE.) and also kinda annoyed at. I mean, I've got so many other assignments I need to tackle, plus I have that upcoming MMP test, which is my last chance to pull my grade up. Plus I'm moving on to Year2 soon, I can't keep going for holidays every time my parents wanna go! :(

Like I said, I'm uptight. Yeah, I'm one of those types with a permanent stick up their ass (yeah, I'm vulgar, so sue me.)

2. I'll need to find a job once we get that upcoming major break before we become juniors. (It's so surreal, I'm gonna be a junior soon OMG. No more being a freshman... It's so weird.)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I've officially gone and talked about school anyway. What. The. Fuck. Even when I'm consciously suppressing the need to yammer on about school, I can't do it.

Since I've already talked about school, I may as well continue. I'm really gonna miss my lecturers when we become juniors. There's a chance that our current lecturers won't be lecturing/tutoring us in Year2, sigh. And I'm really gonna miss them. Mr Selvan, Mrs Wee, Mathias... I'll miss them all. As lecturers I'm probably just another face in the crowd, and they most likely won't remember me, but as a student they have made an impact on me, both in my studies and as a person.

I'm quite glad that I'm one of those goody-two-shoes kind of student, the kind that turns up to all lectures unless dying of sickness or something. I only skipped when I had really bad gastritis (due to overstress, bad sleeping habits and fucked-up eating habits - I skipped meals pretty regularly due to school and work taking precedence over all parts of my life), or when I had to help tighten up a group report or assignment that was due at 5pm. That's me, skipping a lecture just to study for the next one. Major sigh.

One day I'd like to break free. Run away maybe. Put green streaks into my hair. Get a tattoo. Invest in a total wardrobe change (like for clothes that suit the Gothic scene better - I still haven't been able to drastically alter my dressing style, I'm such a weenie). Anything. I just need to get out of this boring, mundane, meaningless rut I've thrown myself into.

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