300416 - Museum x Red

#100happydays: DAY 10

Passed by the National Museum on the way home last night and saw little food stalls set up for the Singapore Heritage Fest - the fairy lights were so pretty I couldn't help but snap a quick picture - apologies for the bad quality!

101 Things I Think About: DAY 10
Got my hair dyed today - I've been dyeing my hair ever since I completed my student internship in my final year of studying in TP, and was a deal I made with my mother that I would be allowed to dye my hair when I had gone through my internship with no trouble.

I first dyed my hair black with red streaks, but eventually moved on to a full head of red hair because I liked how fiery it was, and from then on it was always brighter, redder.

The chemicals I used today were stronger than usual and it stung so badly when the hairdresser applied it, but I grit my teeth and told myself that it was worth it, all worth it. I've shared before why I always dye my hair red, and that reason hasn't changed much - if anything, red is a constant reminder of how I won't let my arms and thighs bleed for me any more.

It's been a year since I relapsed (Panda laughed when I freaked out because he had been tracking it and I hadn't) and I'm not letting myself go back down that road again. I've been there, done that, and survived with the fridge magnet and crappy T-shirt. I've got a long way to go before I'm 100% okay again, but I think that the little I have right now is a long way from where I started to begin with and I'm proud of that.


The stereotype of bright red hair never ceases to both frustrate and amuse, though - it's funny how people actually tell me how I used to be "such a good girl" when I had my virgin hair of dark brownish-black and ask me what's happened to me, and why I've become an "Ah Lian" - the local term for a Chinese female hooligan (oh look, there's even a Wiki page to provide a definition!).

It's mostly quite funny when this happens, and I was quite tickled when the hairdresser (who's been doing my hair for years) commented on how I'd changed from a nice good girl to an Ah Lian the last time I dyed my hair. It does get a bit annoying when people tell me I shouldn't dye my hair red, though, simply because they feel it doesn't make me look like the good girl I used to be, as if a person's personality changes as easily as their hair colour does. I'm still me, honestly, just with hair that looks a lot better now.

It's interesting how this perspective changes, but you know what? I like it. I like how people look at me differently with my red hair - if they want to call me an Ah Lian then so be it, I know a few Ah Lians who are actually much nicer people than some of those who look down on them.

I've got red hair, and I chose it myself, and I'm proud of it.

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