Japan Day 1

So... We're in Japan! Or Kagoshime, so to speak - it's our first stop before moving to Kumamoto tomorrow. 

Kagoshime is... Boring. I'm sorry, but there's no other way to phrase it. It's a lovely little town really, and I would love to stay here if I were a retiree - there's literally nothing else to do here but enjoy the sea (and the hot spring sand baths) and maybe some pachinko (which is basically a slot machine game that Japan loves). 

Everything's good so far, dad and I haven't killed each other yet (we didn't even snap at each other, this is how much Japan affects us - it's almost pathetic how we seem to get along fine when we're in a place we both love or when we have no choice but to get along) and we're actually working together to get to each area - the GPS requires a map code so I have to help him figure everything out. 

I've said it before and I'll say it again - I'm no technician, but hear me roar anyway.

Day 1 down, 29 more days to go. Let's hope this good mood between us lasts.

On to others now: I miss my mum. And Milk. And my friends. Ah, fuck. I wouldn't say I'm homesick, but I do still feel lonely. It's made worse because my dad and I are both individualistic people, so it feels like I'm on a trip with one other person instead of being one-half of a traveling duo with my dad. Get what I'm trying to say? :/

So yeah, still feeling lonely but the fantastic scenery here plus sheer love for this country means that I'm still coping instead of plummeting further down the abyss. 

Still pissed off at Aoi-kun, but... I don't know. Like I've said before, maybe he's dead, maybe he's found someone better, maybe he's decided he's had enough fun stringing me along. Call me out on my defeatist attitude if you will - it's what you're left with when this happens often enough to you. I'm trying to change this thinking, but it's hard, okay? Let me slip back once in a while and speak what I actually think when I'm in this state of mind. Remember when I said this month would be spent thinking a lot? This is me typing down some of the thoughts before they spill over. 

I'm not mad at him, and I'm not exactly upset anymore. I'm just... Disappointed, I guess. I wouldn't say I'm giving up either, I'm just disappointed because after everything, after trying to change, I'm still a naive little girl who believes that "something good" could happen out of this.

The worst part is how I still believe that something good could happen, fool that I am.

Depressing thoughts aside, I'm going to crash for the night - it's an hour ahead here so I've got to sleep a little more. 
お休みなさい，みんなさん！

Comments

  1. UnknownMay 9, 2014 at 12:47 PM

    Hey nat! Happened to be free so i thought of looking at your blog. HOKKAIDO'S A BEAUTIFUL PLACE! would really love to go there again. I miss u too. Haha. Did you miss me???
    Btw,who's aoi kun?
    彼氏なの? >_<

    ReplyDelete

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